Not really struggling with that.” And that honesty is free of ego. If you're honest with yourself, you could say, "Hey, I'm really good at this. Most of us are not the best in the world at everything, and we're not the worst in the world at everything. Ego has this manipulative way of taking you on either route, which stops you from honesty. So just as ego makes you think that you're the best, ego also makes you also want to be the worst.Įgo also tricks you into low self-esteem. We think of ego as that, but actually ego can be the opposite. I think that we struggle because we often think of ego as just bravado, arrogance or cockiness. You recognize that it's a symbiotic relationship.įriedman: Ego can be a big impediment to many problems that people have in their life. Therefore, you don't have the ego of being a giver, and you don't have the inferiority complex of being a receiver. That's why in monk teachings there is no giver or receiver because they're both one and the same. So when I receive a gift from you, I'm also a giver because I'm giving you the opportunity to give something to me. But the opposite is more interesting, in receiving their giving. If I give you a gift or a present and you're happy, I then receive that same joy. There's no giving or receiving because we already know when you give something to someone, you receive the joy that they experience when they receive it. Shetty: In monk teachings, there is no giver or receiver because in giving, you receive and in receiving, you give. So, sacrifice is actually the human way to actually build yourself and grow yourself, because all it does is help people recognize, and you recognize, your talents and skills. Not because of your ego, but because you've actually given something of value to someone else. When you see people respond back and say, "Hey, when I listened to that podcast, it had such a huge impact on me," that boosts your self-esteem. I'm sure you being a podcast host and being an author, when you see your book, The Lemonade Life, help people, it boosts your self-confidence.
People say, "I have no self esteem," or "I don't have a high significance level." We only feel significance or a boost in self-esteem when you see the impact- your words, thoughts and actions have on other people. People say, "I'm not confident." But we don't feel confident because we're not doing anything for anyone that helps us feel confident. The reason why I think it's so powerful is we don't realize how much of our happiness, joy, significance is built when we help people. Shetty: The best way to simplify sacrifice is living for purpose greater than yourself. What does it mean to really sacrifice from the perspective of Think Like a Monk? And being able to create that dialogue with yourself.įriedman: Let’s talk about sacrifice. What I mean by relationship with yourself is knowing what you really like, knowing what your values are, knowing what's blocking you from your potential, knowing what you're scared of, knowing why you're scared of it. I thought that those four to eight hours helped me develop a relationship with myself.
In the same way as it takes more than five minutes to get to know someone else, it takes more than five minutes to get to know yourself. You cannot start to create this dialogue with yourself. The amount of clarity and the amount of freedom that gives you to actually get to know which thoughts are actually useful, which ones are hurtful, which ones are helpful, which ones are healthy, which ones are not healthy. So one of the things you feel when you take out that time is it's the one time in your life when your mind and your body are in the same place for a long amount of time. That's the friction that we feel, that our mind and our body are never aligned. So sometimes we're stuck in our head, and sometimes we're just stuck running around. Either we're disengaged mentally because we're absorbed physically, or we're disengaged physically because we're absorbed mentally. So we all find this friction in our life. The funny thing is most of us are so busy physically that we're disengaged mentally. Shetty: The other thing that we used to do in that time in the beginning phase was just to be able to journal a lot about what our mind did come up with. It just became so attractive to want to serve and help people.įriedman: Journaling is a wonderful way to capture our sentiments and make them more concrete and powerful. He actually had a time to put it all into practice to benefit people's lives.
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